Things have been a lot slower since the poverty simulation. This week at our new ministry site (Salt and Sea) things were a lot different. The woman who run the ministry (pastor Debbie) is so encouraging. She used to be homeless herself, living under the board walk in Coney Island and 20 some years ago she started Salt and Sea doing food pantries and having church services. We got to lead the bible study for the people in the city that wanted to come. It was very different since half of the people didn't speak english but when we sang they had so much fun. We all got to share our testimonies which was really encouraging to hear everyones story in our ministry group.
I've been learning a lot about myself. Growing in ways that I wasn't expecting. I have so much compassion for the needy now...and I'm learning how to communicate with them better. It's hard being able to relate to them, but talking to them is so encouraging....and I wish they knew that. I find that the needy people in Coney Island have so much faith...more than you could imagine...and it's just so great.
I've been seeing new things in myself that I never knew were there...mostly in my personality. It's been a struggle accepting who I am...my personality...and I want to see myself the way God made me...the way He designed me.
There are 19 days left and I am so excited to see what else God has for me in this big City.
Friday, June 26, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
3 days 3 nights pretty much homeless
I've been having a hard time getting internet so this is a little late. so much has happened in the past week. we started our ministry sites on Monday but I won't even talk about the first couple of days.
It started Wednesday...It was the longest day at the ministry site and we had 20 minutes from the time we got back till we had a "prayer meeting"...I didn't even want to go to the meeting. Then they pulled something out of nowhere. A poverty simulation. They gave us 15 minutes to run to our rooms and get three items (I got blanket, water, and pretzels) Then we had 30 minutes to get to Queens at the Here's Life Inner City warehouse where we would be living for who knows how long. We had fake money and they could steal from us if we don't have a hold of our stuff. They would give us random chance cards to win or lose money, go homeless, or other stuff. So, we were shut in the warehouse. 19 people on the cement and one toilet. half of the people didn't bring their blanket and it was freezing...add that to sleeping on the ground. I ended up crying a lot because I was so overwhelmed and worrying about everything...Sam had to calm me down...It was just so crazy and surreal. I didn't sleep at all the first night and at one point there were 4 of us sitting in a circle with my blanket over our heads to keep warm. I couldn't help but complain...even knowing what the point is on the simulation. I also started wishing I would have called my mom and changed my voicemail bc I didn't know how long it would last. I continued to wonder why I chose the inner city track instead of Art or Campus. And why did God want me on this one? for the challenge? bc I don't like challenge.
The next day was super hard at the ministry site not having any sleep at all. We were so blessed being at that ministry site because they gave us love and food...otherwise we wouldn't have eaten. That night I had payed $6 of the $20 fake money they gave us for dinner...which was a banana and peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I paid $7 to sleep upstairs on carpet instead of on the cold cement ground. This is when I started thinking like a homeless person...thinking about just myself and being selfish....I get so sad thinking about how selfish I was...it's not like me. I took my blanket instead of leaving it for someone...I finally got 5 hours of sleep. I'll never again complain about the loud sounds that keep me up at school. The whole situation made me appreciate the little things...like a toothbrush and a pillow. I began feeling really bitter about it and didn't even want to look at the staff.
That next day (friday) we only had to be at our ministry site for 3 hours...within those three hours they had a fish fry...so my whole team smelled like fish the rest of our homeless life. People on the subways didn't want to sit by us...we were looked down on even. it was so humiliating. That night I was just so ready to go home. For dinner we got cards that either said low-class, middle-class, or wealthy...all but 6 people were low-class. We got different meals...cereal, sandwich, or spagettii. It was really interesting to hear the stats on the worlds poverty and actually experience it. Again, I spend $7 to sleep upstairs but we had to wait till midnight and when the time came, they told us to go on the roof. So, 2am came around and I finally went to sleep...6am they kicked us out and we were sleeping on the streets until 9...people were even using garbage bags to keep warm...It was so crazy literally sleeping on the streets. As if it wasn't bad already, they told us we would be on the streets for the day where we had to beg for food money, get something useful out of the trash, and a few other things. I found myself searching the ground for change and looking in the trash for dry bags because it was raining. Kasi, Kelly, and I ended up using a coffee cup out of the trash to beg for money. We were sitting at the park wrapped in my blanket in the rain. It was really awkward and embarrassing. Once again, we were so blessed...3 missionaries came and talked to us, prayed with us, and gave us money to eat. It was definitely a God thing. I think at that point I was ok with the situation because I got to actually be in poverty and have to put myself in their shoes. We had to meet up as a group and since we were late everyone got a change card...which said that the simulation was OVER! I was so happy. That night they treated us to a really nice dinner. I have never been that happy to brush my teeth and take a shower.
So, of course I left things out...it was a really crazy few days. Eventhough I would say that it was the worst experience I learned a lot. It brought out things in me that I never want to see again...including selfishness and bitterness.
now, we are starting a new ministry site and I just ask for a few prayers...
strength...physically, emotioanlly, and spiritually.
that the enemy doesn't get my down.
that I can grow and get past my struggle...and that I can leave the struggles here that I brought with me.
It started Wednesday...It was the longest day at the ministry site and we had 20 minutes from the time we got back till we had a "prayer meeting"...I didn't even want to go to the meeting. Then they pulled something out of nowhere. A poverty simulation. They gave us 15 minutes to run to our rooms and get three items (I got blanket, water, and pretzels) Then we had 30 minutes to get to Queens at the Here's Life Inner City warehouse where we would be living for who knows how long. We had fake money and they could steal from us if we don't have a hold of our stuff. They would give us random chance cards to win or lose money, go homeless, or other stuff. So, we were shut in the warehouse. 19 people on the cement and one toilet. half of the people didn't bring their blanket and it was freezing...add that to sleeping on the ground. I ended up crying a lot because I was so overwhelmed and worrying about everything...Sam had to calm me down...It was just so crazy and surreal. I didn't sleep at all the first night and at one point there were 4 of us sitting in a circle with my blanket over our heads to keep warm. I couldn't help but complain...even knowing what the point is on the simulation. I also started wishing I would have called my mom and changed my voicemail bc I didn't know how long it would last. I continued to wonder why I chose the inner city track instead of Art or Campus. And why did God want me on this one? for the challenge? bc I don't like challenge.
The next day was super hard at the ministry site not having any sleep at all. We were so blessed being at that ministry site because they gave us love and food...otherwise we wouldn't have eaten. That night I had payed $6 of the $20 fake money they gave us for dinner...which was a banana and peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I paid $7 to sleep upstairs on carpet instead of on the cold cement ground. This is when I started thinking like a homeless person...thinking about just myself and being selfish....I get so sad thinking about how selfish I was...it's not like me. I took my blanket instead of leaving it for someone...I finally got 5 hours of sleep. I'll never again complain about the loud sounds that keep me up at school. The whole situation made me appreciate the little things...like a toothbrush and a pillow. I began feeling really bitter about it and didn't even want to look at the staff.
That next day (friday) we only had to be at our ministry site for 3 hours...within those three hours they had a fish fry...so my whole team smelled like fish the rest of our homeless life. People on the subways didn't want to sit by us...we were looked down on even. it was so humiliating. That night I was just so ready to go home. For dinner we got cards that either said low-class, middle-class, or wealthy...all but 6 people were low-class. We got different meals...cereal, sandwich, or spagettii. It was really interesting to hear the stats on the worlds poverty and actually experience it. Again, I spend $7 to sleep upstairs but we had to wait till midnight and when the time came, they told us to go on the roof. So, 2am came around and I finally went to sleep...6am they kicked us out and we were sleeping on the streets until 9...people were even using garbage bags to keep warm...It was so crazy literally sleeping on the streets. As if it wasn't bad already, they told us we would be on the streets for the day where we had to beg for food money, get something useful out of the trash, and a few other things. I found myself searching the ground for change and looking in the trash for dry bags because it was raining. Kasi, Kelly, and I ended up using a coffee cup out of the trash to beg for money. We were sitting at the park wrapped in my blanket in the rain. It was really awkward and embarrassing. Once again, we were so blessed...3 missionaries came and talked to us, prayed with us, and gave us money to eat. It was definitely a God thing. I think at that point I was ok with the situation because I got to actually be in poverty and have to put myself in their shoes. We had to meet up as a group and since we were late everyone got a change card...which said that the simulation was OVER! I was so happy. That night they treated us to a really nice dinner. I have never been that happy to brush my teeth and take a shower.
So, of course I left things out...it was a really crazy few days. Eventhough I would say that it was the worst experience I learned a lot. It brought out things in me that I never want to see again...including selfishness and bitterness.
now, we are starting a new ministry site and I just ask for a few prayers...
strength...physically, emotioanlly, and spiritually.
that the enemy doesn't get my down.
that I can grow and get past my struggle...and that I can leave the struggles here that I brought with me.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Team Building
yesterday we were told to wear clothes we can get gross in..and were given directions to a warehouse in Queens, which ended up being the Here's Life Inner City office/warehouse. I had no idea what to expect. Our first activity we were given a number and we had to get on our hands and knees and make the animal noise that was given to that number. I had to sound like a pig with my eyes closed listening for other pigs...that was so interesting. That's how we got put into our ministry groups. So, for the next four weeks I will be working with Dayne, Nicole, Kasi, and Katrina. Throughout the day we did different team building games and a few were quite uncomfortable for me, most of them I have done before with Southeastern's leadership team...overall we had really good communicaton and worked really well together.
I'm nervous but really excited about our group and the ministry sites. I know I was called here and put in certain groups so that I can grow. The majority of the group have dominant personalities and I don't...so that will definitely help me with being the student direction on campus next year.
Today we went to C3 Manhattan (Christian City Church Manhattan)...it was really good. We will be going to a different church every sunday...most likely the church in the ministry site we will be working in.
On our free time today 5 of us went to China Town which was super sketchy but I guess normal...shopping out of a van, suitcase, and secret doors in the shops...leading to fake designer bags. It was so strange.
So, tomorrow we start our ministry site and in an hour I find out where our first site is. Just pray that God works through us in every situation.
I'm praying He gives me strength and wisdom....and definitely patience.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
First few days
My third day is coming to an end and so much has already happened. We haven't started the ministry sites yet, because we are getting to know the City and build relationships together....not only with my track(inner city) but also the epic (Asian American) track, art track, and campus track.
first day...arriving I had no idea what to except. I found myself getting really overwhelmed the first day from meeting everyone and walking around the city. My first thought walking to kmart was "dang these people are on a mission." Everyone is just go go go. I found myself missing the Southern hospitality. I'm praying that I get adjusted to this new culture.
second day...was so crazy and amazing. We had our morning meeting and we broke off into our dinner groups which are combined with people from each track. (I love them.) We ate Vietnamese food and immediately bonded. So this was our time to explore the city and learn the subway...which is crazy in itself. We got to visit Central Park and the top of the Rockafella building. I think the most interesting time was taking the subway to Brooklyn to find a pizza place which we didn't end up finding...I'm hoping I get the hang of this huge City trying to find my way around.
Today...was really good! We started our training learning about contextualizing and had cross culture training....learning how to reach people from different cultures. We started evangelism training as well. We then got to meet with just our track for the first time getting to know each other and I'm so excited to build relationships with all of them. We also had our first PODS (Purposeful, something(haha), Discipleship, Support) and I'm so happy with who God has put me with to grow so much this summer.
The end of my night was spent with two of my awesome roomates, Sam, Katrina, and Chaley...we ate at a famous pizza place and then went to Time Sqaure...which was like a migraine waiting to happen with all the lights but it was so beautiful. Sadly, the pizza made me sick but I luckily have amazing friends here already that were helpful. I came to Sam's apartment and as I was sitting with my head down from feeling sick her roomate Jenny came over, put her hand on my stomach and just prayed for me. 10 minutes later Sam was praying for Jenny....the fact that I'm already building these amazing relationships, surrounded by such prayer warriors and encouraging people and it just brings tears to my eyes.
so as I approach all the training and ministry sites I just ask that you continue to pray for me. That God be my feet and my hands. That he gives me wisdom and speaks through me. Thanks for all the prayer...it means so much to me.
Monday, June 8, 2009
It's time!
I leave tomorrow...well actually I will be on the plane in 7 hours! It's so surreal. There are so many emotions about this summer and I can't wait. God has provided in so many ways, even when I started to lose hope! I'm so thankful for everyone who has supported me financially and especially through prayer...that's the most important thing while I'm in New York...that I have a group of amazing believers willing to spend time in prayer for the ministry work we will be doing in NYC. I'm so blessed to have parents who are willing to help out as much as they have...and support me in so many ways.
I love you all and I ask that you continue to pray for me and all the other students who I will be spending the next 5 weeks with...growing and doing God's work.
:)
I love you all and I ask that you continue to pray for me and all the other students who I will be spending the next 5 weeks with...growing and doing God's work.
:)
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
one week away
It's so close. Only a week until I leave on a jet plane to New York City for Summer Project. This past month has been a struggle being home. Not constantly surrounded by people who are going to encourage me. I wasn't spending time with the Lord...at all for that matter. And it showed. This past week I needed to change that and I'm now back to being excited about the summer that is ahead of me. Of course I still have over $500 to raise and only a week to do it, but I know it will work out. I'm filled with so many emotions...two being excited and nervous. I don't know what to expect when I get there but I just can't wait to see how God uses me outside of my comfort zone...way outside. I'm ready to grow closer to the Lord, grow close to the other students I'll be living with and fellowshipping with, reach out to the people of the inner city, and of course to be in NYC. I'm also really glad I'm sharing this experience with one of my closest friends and future roomie, Sam.
I'm so ready for the best summer.
I'm so ready for the best summer.
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